Designer Taniya Nayak 鈥97 Calls on Women to Support Each Other
Image by John Wren
06/28/2016
By Katharine Webster
The university鈥檚 first annual was a resounding success, with a sellout crowd, inspiring and high-powered speakers, practical advice 鈥 and lots of laughter.
The conference opened with a conversation between designer and TV personality 鈥97 and Chancellor Jacquie Moloney, the first women chancellor of 51视频, about Nayak鈥檚 sometimes bumpy road to success, including flunking out of the university her freshman year.
鈥淭he chancellor came up with a program called Restart, so freshmen could begin again,鈥 Nayak said. 鈥淚 came back 鈥 and I crushed it.鈥
After graduating with a bachelor鈥檚 degree in marketing, she worked in a series of unsatisfying sales jobs until she decided to follow her passion for painting, drawing and architecture at the Boston Architectural College.聽
But a lack of confidence still plagued her at times, she said. The school recommended its interior design students audition for ABC Family鈥檚 鈥淜nock First,鈥 just for the experience. Nayak had talked herself out of it 鈥 until a friend persuaded her she had nothing to lose. She landed the role and 13 years later she owns her own design firm, appears regularly on HGTV and the Food Network and represents Ellen Degeneres鈥 home d茅cor line on QVC.
Nayak, who has encountered both racism and sexism working with clients and construction crews, said she counters it by preparing thoroughly and speaking with confidence.
鈥淚n this industry, knowledge is everything,鈥 she said.
Image by John Wren
Moloney, who succeeded in a number of positions at 51视频 before being chosen as chancellor, agreed.
鈥淚t鈥檚 that idea of being respectful, but holding your own,鈥 she said.
Networking with other women is important, too, Nayak said.
鈥淭hat鈥檚 what it鈥檚 all about 鈥 us here as women, helping other women and supporting each other,鈥 she said.
Those themes 鈥 supporting other women, confronting bias with expertise and finding your voice 鈥 played out over the course of the day in workshops that dealt with everything from mental and financial health, to moving women into leadership roles, to closing the gender wage gap. Former Massachusetts Lt. Gov. Evelyn Murphy, now president of聽 gave a workshop on salary negotiations, while accomplished executives in other sessions bemoaned the fact that young women are still afraid to advocate for themselves when it comes to pay and promotions.
Image by John Wren
鈥淚鈥檝e seen a lot of young women who don鈥檛 stretch and reach because they think they don鈥檛 know all of it. Young men know 50 percent and they think they鈥檙e good to go,鈥 said (http://www.nitscheng.com/?t=1&DO=71&DI=2824&format=xml&stylesheet=NE_Principal&p=5424) Lisa Brothers 鈥84, co-founder and chief executive of , at a panel on 鈥淣avigating the Gender-Segregated Workplace,鈥 organized by the Center for Women and Work. 鈥淵oung women never ask for more (pay) than we give them and young men are always at the table.鈥
Deborah Chausse, executive director of House of Hope homeless shelter and transitional housing in Lowell, said women should assert themselves and refuse to be bullied.
鈥淏uild a reputation and don鈥檛 deviate from it. Know where the line is that you鈥檙e not willing to cross and don鈥檛 cross it,鈥 she said.
Smile, stay positive and build relationships, said Saravon Khun-Leng, a Cambodian refugee who rose through the ranks at the to become director of community relations. And keep pushing for greater diversity.
鈥淚 am working to hire as many women and minority officers as I can,鈥 she said.
, who works in marketing and financial education for Hanscom Federal Credit Union, said she was impressed with the conference compared to similar events she鈥檚 attended.聽
鈥淭his is more the nitty-gritty for women in the workforce,鈥 she said. 鈥淚鈥檓 getting out of this that self-care is important and being your own advocate is important. You can鈥檛 wait around for someone else to speak for you.鈥澛
Image by John Wren
The closing keynote was delivered by , professor of English and women鈥檚 studies at the University of Connecticut and author of
Barreca began her talk by answering the two questions uppermost in women鈥檚 minds when they meet another woman: Is she older than me? Does she weigh more than me?
鈥淲omen look at other women like we鈥檙e trying to guess each other鈥檚 ages and weight 鈥 like we鈥檙e at a state fair,鈥 she said.
Riffing on women鈥檚 obsession with each other鈥檚 weight and appearance, she said women are always trying to squeeze themselves into clothes that don鈥檛 fit 鈥 just like they鈥檙e always trying to squeeze themselves into someone else鈥檚 idea of the good woman, the good mother or the good administrator.
鈥淲omen are trying to change themselves to fit into something that鈥檚 off the rack,鈥 she said. 鈥淵ou have never heard a man say, 鈥業鈥檓 going to be a 42 short by the holidays.鈥欌澛
She talked about the difference in men鈥檚 and women鈥檚 communication styles and demonstrated the 鈥渟ilver tinkling bell laugh鈥 women use when someone鈥檚 telling a boring story. Her audience responded with shouts of laughter 鈥 the kind that erupts when women are actually having a good time.
鈥淲omen are taught to rein ourselves in. There鈥檚 not a woman in this room who hasn鈥檛 felt like she was too much, too loud, too brassy, too needy,鈥 she said.聽
It鈥檚 time to change that, she said. Laugh only when a story is funny, refuse to 鈥渟ettle down鈥 and refuse to settle for less than what you really want: 鈥淎 good time and a fair fight.鈥
Oh, and enough with the self-deprecation already.
鈥淚f someone gives you a compliment, say 鈥楾hank you,鈥 don鈥檛 tell them why they鈥檙e wrong,鈥 she said. 鈥淲hen someone comes up to you and says, 鈥楪reat project,鈥 don鈥檛 say, 鈥業 did nothing. Really, I didn鈥檛 do a thing 鈥 my team did it all.鈥欌
